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Dear miserable biological male

Dear miserable biological female

That covers 100%

of the worlds

population

We are very sorry to learn that content (which is not ours) on this website has upset you. We assume that you spent valuable time looking for that content and that it never occured to you to turn the fucking website off. In order to allevate your self created stress, may we suggest that you try one of the following well-proven remedies.

A. Cry a large amount of crocodile tears (be sure to add plenty of snot ) into a pair of your favourite undies. At midnight tonight bury the undies with some magic beans. Tomorrow morning, climb the bean stalk and fuck off ! (PS - bring a fresh pair of undies with you)

B. Get a bottle of chilli sauce. Find a dark corner in a dark place (the morgue, a perverts basement, the back of your grannies wardrobe). Take a large amount of the chilli sauce in your favourite hand, close your eyes, tilt your head back and fuck yourself ! (PS - check the wank-by-date on the bottle first ).

As a gesture of goodwill, we have attached a link that we hope will be of some help to you.